I was to put this post up a lot sooner, like last week but tech concerns happened. All sorted now. This post will have part 1 & 2. It’s rather long than usual but do enjoy this one from me to you!
Truth be told, I have had assorted kind of emotions since this year started. But let’s talk about my 1st quarter century. Yeah guys….am that young…lol. I remember last year when I was turning 25 and it’s a good number but if I was to be candid it is a little intimidating number. My concern actually was not the turning of 25 it was more of what have I done with my 25 years. I felt cheated, betrayed, sad and really devastated. Along the way I realized it’s officially the youngest I will ever be so I needed to get on board really quick and stop with mopping and in with Optimism.
Worrying is like a rocking chair, it will give you something to do but it will get you nowhere.
Now for those people who know me personally, they know I can be as high as 100 and go down to 0 really fast. I mean life happens. For the longest duration of my life I lived a day at a time, and I still do. I think about the 25 years of life that I have had already and am overwhelmed….let’s see. So about 25 years back, I was born in Pumwani hospital. I grew up a little in Huruma before we moved to Kahawa West then to Githurai and finally to Kasarani, which is basically home now.
Primary was good, I don’t really remember what I wanted to do then though. In secondary school I began to have my voice but yet again I wasn’t sure what I wanted but I was sure I wanted to do something I loved, something that made a difference and something fun and motivating enough to get me out of bed daily. So that brings us to Campus which was pretty just campus for me. What people don’t know about me is I almost always never had it easy in any of those times, neither primary, neither secondary nor campus.
My transition from one phase to another was never as smooth, they pretty much all required for me to dig up from within, and I mean really dig deep from within. No matter the bad grades I still somehow fought. I will not say that it was effortless and that at no point did I not contemplate on giving up but somehow I pulled through, I really did. I remember the craziest and most difficult of them all was when I received my KCSE results. My brother who for a long time has been a best friend to me and as goofy as he is talked to me, he saw the pain I felt and he checked up on me consistently. And once or twice (am being modest here) I had relapses but somehow I survived them all. Then campus, I was up tight for the most academic years of campus and yet again I did not get what I set out for myself. It was good I just wanted better.
What am trying to say is my seasons in life have not always worked out as planned but I have learned to do my very best. I work smart and hard, I pray harder and I wish for the stars and the rare hardest. I dream big. I refuse to think of myself less because a certain paper says otherwise. Or analytics that show chances of probability. For the most significant part of my life I have always lived by this:
‘If you can’t stand tall before men, then kneel before God’
Trust that even if you writing a page you’ve never written before or you choose to say it a little differently people will always love you for saying as you see it in your lenses. People who have said that you are not good enough or made you feel not good enough are a distraction. Ignore what everyone else is doing. Life for me even as I cross to a new unknown 26, I choose to be defined by breaking my own limits outgrowing myself in order to live the best life that I can and the only person I need to compete with is the girl at the end of my mirror. No more distractions.
The reason as why cars have big windscreen is so you are glued to your future and where you are headed. The side mirrors are small, so as to steal glimpse of the past so as not to make the same mistakes. Don’t look at the past so much. Keep it moving and Do you.
I ask, I believe and I receive. You can believe that. It is for such reasons that I started this blog, because in spite of all difficulties I have risen above all odds. I do what I am passionate about because am my biggest cheer leader. So be yours too.
‘I can’t think of any better representation of beauty than someone who is unafraid to be herself’
Happy New Year to me…………26 please be nice!!!