This town is beautiful. This town is where my dreams will come to life. Seated at the left side back sit and a quick thought of madam secretary feel dashes in and out of my mind so quick even a snap shot couldn’t even catch it. This town is most beautiful at night, the sky is dark; a hay of some dark navy blue clouds paint the sky, no stars but the moon is having a collaboration with the street lights. Cruising on the clear bypass and directly through the highway…. can it get any beautiful?
I close my eyes and savor the night; the cold breeze blows through my quarter downed window. My cheeks get cold and I run my fingers on my face to warm the chill. As soon as my face can balance the temperatures I remember tomorrow is Monday and just like that a daze fills my face but still; my eyes glued out of the window. I tell myself I have faced more Mondays than weekends, but this Monday at the back of my mind will always be different. It will take something out of me but it will also plant another chapter in my town. Ten….nine….eight… I count myself down all the way to one and I BREATH. In and out and just like that am back to this beautiful town.
The tall trees, the good road, the street lights and the breeze is swift as it takes me back. A sense of overwhelming nostalgia fills me up. I think about my life and how young the year seems to be yet so much is already in motion. At 26 what much have I have done? What more am I proud of? What best defines me? I have had challenges but I tell myself I have done well given everything that has been thrown my way. A tap on my back for this will definitely go a long way. I have been strong, I have been vulnerable…. I can live with this, besides I have more room to face what is coming so another tap on my back for staying true to myself will cheer me on.
I have dreamt but I keep dreaming, am genuinely content with the decisions I have made; even when at the end of the rope somehow I have managed to tie just one more knot; just to hang on long enough till I can manage to take a rest between two breaths. This dreaming remains constant no matter how tough it may try to prove it holds my future reality. Love? Mmmhh, I have a lot of heart to go around but not for everyone to exploit. But exploited it has, at least that’s how I feel. I have failed to guard my heart with a jealousy of a hurt unknown. But here I have failed somehow. I have loved wrong. This is hard to comprehend but even harder to forgive myself for…. but then time may just be the trick, I guess am on this journey, seems time on this is in no rush.
My carried away thoughts are cut short as we pull over by the parking lot; carried no more I am much aware of my reality. Just a few minutes to nine o’clock. The weekend flew by so fast. I need to find my bed soon because I need to stay sane through out the week. Oh my pretty little eyes, that yawn just justified how much I need to skip dinner, am full anyway. I hope this week is shorter, knowing what I know I feel even more confident this girl will have some play time this week…. something to smile about. And just like that another week, a step closer to my reality and all good tidings set to fall in my path in due time. Am addicted to bettering myself no matter what. I refuse to let anything and everything put me down.
Am that girl, that girl who dreams big, that girl who falls seven times but gets up eight times, that girl who is on a roll and believes in a Higher power than the shooting stars. I tell myself I am right where I was meant to be, everything is unfolding exactly as it should and my job is to BREATHE, be kind to MYSELF and quietly do what needs to be done. Everything will work out, it will be better soon and this too shall pass. I am strong, I can do this!
Ask.Believe.Receive…………………..Always go the Extra Mile, it’s never packed.